Limit Your Counselors

The Fruit of the Counselor: Choosing Wisely Who Shapes Your Path

Proverbs 11:14 declares, “Where there is no counsel, the people fall; But in the multitude of counselors there is safety.”¹ This verse highlights the vital role of seeking advice and wisdom from others in navigating the complexities of life.² However, it begs a crucial question: whose counsel should we embrace? While seeking guidance is essential, the Bible also cautions us to be discerning about the source of that guidance. Proverbs 12:5 warns, “The thoughts of the righteous are right, But the counsels of the wicked are deceitful.”

This leads us to a profound truth: your counselors cannot give you what they do not possess themselves. Just as a withered vine cannot bear succulent grapes, a counselor struggling with anger cannot impart peace, nor can a counselor trapped in financial turmoil guide you to prosperity. This principle extends beyond tangible matters to encompass spiritual and emotional well-being. Can someone steeped in bitterness offer genuine forgiveness? Can someone wrestling with fear instill courage in your heart?

Therefore, when seeking counsel, it is imperative to consider the life and fruit of the counselor. Do their actions align with their words? Does their life reflect the wisdom they impart? Do you see in them the qualities you desire to cultivate in your own life? Jesus Himself emphasized the importance of judging a tree by its fruit (Matthew 7:16-20).³ He warned against false prophets who come in sheep’s clothing but inwardly are ravenous wolves.⁴ Similarly, we must be vigilant in discerning the true nature of those who offer us guidance.

This is not to say we should only seek counsel from those who have achieved perfection. We all fall short of God’s glory, and every believer is on a journey of growth and sanctification. However, there should be evidence of God’s grace at work in their lives. Look for the fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23).⁵⁶ These qualities should be evident in their character, relationships, and how they handle life’s challenges.

Consider these crucial aspects when evaluating a potential counselor:

• Their walk with God: Do they demonstrate a deep and abiding relationship with the Lord through prayer, Bible study, and obedience to His Word?
• Their character: Are they known for their integrity, honesty, and humility? Do they exemplify the values they espouse?
• Their relationships: How do they treat their spouse, children, family, and friends? Do their relationships reflect healthy boundaries and mutual respect?
• Their track record: Have they successfully navigated similar challenges to the ones you face? Have they demonstrated wisdom and discernment in their own decisions?

Furthermore, it is crucial to align your counsel with your goals. What do you aspire to achieve in your life? Are you seeking spiritual growth, career advancement, stronger relationships, or emotional healing? Choose counselors who have already walked that path and can offer practical insights and support.

For instance, if you’re struggling with marital issues, seek guidance from couples who have built strong, God-honoring marriages. If you desire to deepen your faith, seek mentorship from mature believers who radiate Christ’s love and wisdom. If you’re facing career decisions, seek advice from those who have excelled in their fields while maintaining their integrity.

Remember, you are ultimately responsible for your choices. While wise counsel can provide valuable insights and guidance, you must prayerfully weigh the advice you receive against the truth of God’s Word and the leading of the Holy Spirit. Proverbs 19:21 reminds us, “Many are the plans in the mind of a man, But it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.”⁷

Ultimately, the best Counselor we can ever have is the Holy Spirit. He is the Spirit of truth who guides us into all truth (John 16:13). Cultivate a close relationship with Him through prayer and the study of God’s Word.⁸ Seek His guidance in all things, and He will lead you to the right counselors and illuminate the path He has for you.

In conclusion, choosing our counselors wisely is a matter of spiritual discernment and self-preservation. By examining the fruit of their lives, aligning their expertise with our goals, and ultimately seeking the guidance of the Holy Spirit, we can ensure that the counsel we embrace leads us closer to God’s will and purpose for our lives.